Losing Your Mables

September 28, 2011
Starbucks
Burbank, CA

Have a piece of some mable loaf.

Seriously... no one proof read that?

Bitch

Wow... and I thought I had it bad...

http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news/7_on_your_side&id=8368831

Talia

September 18, 2011
Trump Plaza
Atlantic City, NJ

My friend Talia put the reservation for our room under her name.

I would like to make 2 points here:
1. The letters "p" and "t" are not close enough to confuse on the keyboard.
2. "Talia" is a fairly common name, while I am going to make the unfair assumption that no one on this planet is named "Palia"

If there is a Palia out there who would like to defend herself, now is the time.

That's not her name.

3 Names, 2 Baristas, 1 Coffee

September 18, 2011
Starbucks
Atlantic City, NJ

A little scenario that my friend Brittany personally witnessed, in case their are any doubts.

We open on a Starbucks in Atlantic City. I have just given my coffee order to the barista. Brittany stands behind me.
Barista #1: Name please
Me: Cara
Barista #1: Great Tara, can I also interest you in a scone?
Me: [groan] No thanks
Brittany giggles.
I hand Barista #1 my credit card. She looks at the name on it. She's confused, but then decides she is still going to go with her gut. I admire her commitment.
Barista #1: Tara, can you please sign here?
Barista #1 then turns to BARISTA #2. Barista #2 has the cup in hand, ready to write, eager for instruction.
Barista #1: That's one grande non-fat pumpkin spice latte no whip for Tara!
Barista #2 writes out the cup. I sign my receipt. Brittany continues to laugh awkwardly.

THIS IS WHAT I ENDED UP WITH:

None of those are my name.

Open for Interpretation

September 9, 2011
California Chicken Cafe
Hollywood, CA

Now when I placed my order for pick up, I spelled my name for him. Twice.
Kewen? Kawer? That's not my name.

Beggers Can Be Choosers

September 8, 2011
Jamba Juice
San Diego, CA

You would think with a name like Ikran, maybe she would pay closer attention to the name her customers give her.
Alas, no.
Give me my frozen fruit and have your ears cleaned. That's not my name.